7. What do Nascar and a Kinkos dumpster have in common? Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. Yeah; I'm racist ._3bX7W3J0lU78fp7cayvNxx{max-width:208px;text-align:center} What does NASCAR stand for? You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta. Q: What dont drivers eat before a big race? It has a top speed of 34, the electrics don't work, and the radio works but only plays the theme from "Hawaii Five-O" and you cant turn it off. I feel like Im one of the few folks who likes NASCAR and soccer. Al Unser Jr. I really need to get my car fixed.What body shop do you wreck-amend? Their prices are just too shocking. What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars?Tyrannosaurus wrecks. What kind of vehicle does a chicken drive?A coop. Saimonas has mainly worked as a freelance graphic designer, illustrator and finds joy in anything related to visual arts. Kyle knocks him down AGAIN, and says, "That was a judo chop from Japan." But I hate NASCAR, What did Michael Jackson have in common with a second-place NASCAR driver? They take the next left. SERIES NEWS. The voice of the Devil was heard: "Rusty, YOU HAVE SINNED!!! And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?" Finally a turn in the right direction. Husband: Honey, the neighbor is washing the car with his son again!, Wife: Poor kid! Q: Do race drivers stop and take a nap? 37. Race-ist fans. 1.We are not so different. Did you hear? Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who Would be saved? You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in the drivers seat of this car!" one advertises there sponspors and the other keeps it hidden! In the spirit of their fascination with all things auto, buckle up for these fun and hilarious kid-friendly car jokes, witty puns, and one-liners that will really move the little or big kid in your life. Let us know what you think! What do you call the world's most badass sedan?A Liam Nissan. Why are fans from Finland critical to motor racing? Sorry if it happens to be a repost.). Two Cadillac drivers got in a fender-bender, got out of their cars, and then started yelling at each other.Within a few seconds, they were in a fistfight. You should get a job at a transmission repair shop. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Violeta Lyskoit. They jump in and save him. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither are hurt. They nees to take him for a ride along at Daytona with some one in a car with a bit more power in a pack of ten or so. Also, she's a firm believer that pineapple belongs on a pizza. If a cars chasing you, youll definitely get tired. Q: What would Dale Earnhardt be doing if he was alive today? Dale looks at him and just points and says " The Potato goes in the front " A: Because it was interfering with Jeff Burtons ability of finish the race! Rowdy Busch says, "That was a karate chop from Korea." Q: How can you tell when a nascar fan is watching a Formula One race? He carefully steps out of the car and opens the trunk. We need to stop mixing races. A: Telling your parents that your Lesbian! (Closed), I Create Functional And Decorative Art On Functional Items That People Can Use Every Day, And Here Are My Newest 23 Works, Hey Pandas, What Are Your Most Useful Travel Tips? Kyle Busch was looking to find a woman so Dale Earnhardt Jr decided to help him out. Potato Bungee Jumping 2. A ten-year old boy was at the center of a Maricopa County courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. Whats the difference between NASCAR and the NBA? I hear in New York City its hailing taxis!. Not bad, although as someone who has played their fair share of soccer I think you might be underestimating the size of a school bus or overestimating the size of a soccer goal. What do the motorsport drivers say during arguments? What kind of vehicle does a chicken drive? A subreddit for everything NASCAR related! Delighted, Dale Earnhardt, taking in the sight of this beautiful piece of Automaking Delight, Shiney and powerful this car is made to run like hell. Why are racecar drivers the best people to go to for dating advice? Dale Earnhardt Jr Again, Jeff misses him. My Subaru accidentally skidded over the bridge. But how will drivers know theyve entered the last lap of the race? Unfortunately, Jeff isn't able to catch him, and Bobby falls again, bounces and comes back up again. Those people are normally sad people that make fun of others for liking something different and just try to fit in with what the cool influencers do. What does the car brand FIAT stand for?Fix-It Again Tomorrow. It reminds him that he never got to finish a race. As he sat there sipping his whiskey, a young woman sat down next to him. Not so sure about that a lot of them have a checkered past. Knocks the daylights out of Little Busch, leaving him out cold! NASCAR wants to control the sport I say let the A: In case they get indy-gestion. Braving the Elements with the Avatar at NYCC 2021! .Rd5g7JmL4Fdk-aZi1-U_V{transition:all .1s linear 0s}._2TMXtA984ePtHXMkOpHNQm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;margin-bottom:4px}.CneW1mCG4WJXxJbZl5tzH{border-top:1px solid var(--newRedditTheme-line);margin-top:16px;padding-top:16px}._11ARF4IQO4h3HeKPpPg0xb{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:none;fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;vertical-align:middle;margin-bottom:2px;margin-left:4px;cursor:pointer}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:hover ._11ARF4IQO4h3HeKPpPg0xb{display:inline-block}._2IvhQwkgv_7K0Q3R0695Cs{border-radius:4px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line)}._2IvhQwkgv_7K0Q3R0695Cs:focus{outline:none}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B{transition:all .1s linear 0s;border-radius:4px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line)}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:focus{outline:none}._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B.IeceazVNz_gGZfKXub0ak,._1I3N-uBrbZH-ywcmCnwv_B:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk._35hmSCjPO8OEezK36eUXpk{margin-top:25px;left:-9px}._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP,._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP:focus-within,._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP._3aEIeAgUy9VfJyRPljMNJP:hover{transition:all .1s linear 0s;border:none;padding:8px 8px 0}._25yWxLGH4C6j26OKFx8kD5{display:inline}._2YsVWIEj0doZMxreeY6iDG{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;padding:4px 6px}._1hFCAcL4_gkyWN0KM96zgg{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;margin-left:auto;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._1hFCAcL4_gkyWN0KM96zgg,._1dF0IdghIrnqkJiUxfswxd{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._1dF0IdghIrnqkJiUxfswxd{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3VGrhUu842I3acqBMCoSAq{font-weight:700;color:#ff4500;text-transform:uppercase;margin-right:4px}._3VGrhUu842I3acqBMCoSAq,.edyFgPHILhf5OLH2vk-tk{font-size:12px;line-height:16px}.edyFgPHILhf5OLH2vk-tk{font-weight:400;-ms-flex-preferred-size:100%;flex-basis:100%;margin-bottom:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX{margin-top:6px}._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._19lMIGqzfTPVY3ssqTiZSX._3MAHaXXXXi9Xrmc_oMPTdP{margin-top:4px} Q: How can you tell when a nascar fan is watching a Formula One race? Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck? The front row at a NASCAR race. What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?A Holly Davidson! Please enter your email to complete registration. Child Welfare It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. Bobby says to Jeff, "You know, we really suck as racers but I bet we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico." because no-one else would be able to ketchup. Held on rough dirt-surfaced tracks, dirt track racing carries several deadly characteristics, such as inadequate barriers, lack of head and neck protective equipment, and below-average medical response. Shaking the Busch, Boss 6. What kind of car does Yoda drive?A Toyoda. -&y. A: A Monte Carlo Seats 6. Why should Microsoft, Intel and Nvidia get into the motorsport business? NASCAR had their 2010 overview today which means its just about that time of year. ._3K2ydhts9_ES4s9UpcXqBi{display:block;padding:0 16px;width:100%} Then, before the cops can ask where he is, he says, "Hey, never mind, I'm in the back seat." Why are stories about Nascars so satisfying? What does he do if Earnhardt Jr wins?" Just imagine how unfair it would be for a horse in NASCAR. NASCAR bans the confederate flag? We respect your privacy. Gradually, the championship moved away from its philosophy of participation of purely production cars - high speeds and asymmetric loads required modifications to improve safety. 60. With patches all over their suits telling us who their sponsors are. A: When he taps you on the shoulder and asks Are we watching qualifying?, 15. Whats the difference between Hitler and a Nascar driver? What's worse than raining cats and dogs?Hailing taxis! What is the worst race in America? Tony Stewart and Jeff Gordon are changing clothes in the locker room. Al Unser Jr calls the police, and says, "They stole my dashboard, they stole my steering wheel, they stole my brake pedal, Hell, they even stole my gas pedal" 20. Why is being a race car driver hard? @keyframes _1tIZttmhLdrIGrB-6VvZcT{0%{opacity:0}to{opacity:1}}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd,.HQ2VJViRjokXpRbJzPvvc{--infoTextTooltip-overflow-left:0px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;padding:3px 9px;position:absolute;border-radius:4px;margin-top:-6px;background:#000;color:#fff;animation:_1tIZttmhLdrIGrB-6VvZcT .5s step-end;z-index:100;white-space:pre-wrap}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd:after,.HQ2VJViRjokXpRbJzPvvc:after{content:"";position:absolute;top:100%;left:calc(50% - 4px - var(--infoTextTooltip-overflow-left));width:0;height:0;border-top:3px solid #000;border-left:4px solid transparent;border-right:4px solid transparent}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd{margin-top:6px}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd:after{border-bottom:3px solid #000;border-top:none;bottom:100%;top:auto} Q: What do you call Michael Waltrip racing with his car tied to the back of Jeff Gordons? What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? replied Matt! After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. How do NASCAR drivers get to the track? So the turns are all right all right all right. A: Half the cars in Sundays Race. A friend told me he likes NASCAR more than Formula 1 This Fathers Day, Busch Beer, as part of its sponsorship of Kevin Harvick and his No. You know what really grinds my gears?Clutch failure. Did you know that Ford is making a new heated tailgate? They're all racists. It's not very long before a police car shows up. My Subaru accidentally skidded over the bridge.I guess its now a Scuba-ru. The mechanic says, "Good trade, sir." If a tire can go on the wrong side, it will. Matt Kenseth and a priest get into a car accident and it's a bad one. A: Caution Flag Yellow Don't worry; the funny jokes about cars won't be targeting you or your driving skills *wink wink*. He is also a racing fan and interestingly, has been an honorary pace car driver for the Indianapolis 500. Who is there? New Teslas dont come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk. A: Caution Flag Yellow, 57. Liberals who watch Rupal Drag Race cannot make fun of conservatives for liking Nascar. Let us know! 64. Q: Why Is Tony Stewart Always In The Lead? What happened when the French vehicle sponsored by the Brie manufacturers got wrecked? Did you hear NASCAR and Formula One were trying to make an Ultimate Showdown race but it got cancelled due to controversy? Why does Hitler hate Nascar? When he comes to, he says, "Boys, you saved a Three Time Winston Cup Champion. Finally a turn in the right direction. "What the hell is going on here?" If I owned a DeLorean, I would probably only drive it from time to time. What is the main difference between BMWs and Porcupines?Porcupines carry their pricks on the outside. The automotive part you left at the body shop is the one you need. What do you call a guy who always loses his car? You should get a job at a transmission repair shop.Im sure youll get used to the early-morning shifts. Matthew McConaughey just bought NASCAR And hes making racers drive the opposite direction. What do all French cars come with as standard? What is the difference between praying in church and on the race track? Illegal drag racing or street racing can become as dangerous or even more dangerous than a Nascar pileup. Why do DJs make terrible drivers? We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. You can change your preferences. NASCAR. Here are the corniest dad jokes to celebrate. Their loss I guess. Who can drive all their customers away and still make money? Id be a terrible NASCAR driver because Im always right. I'm on the highway to hell, but ran over the pothole to hell and need the roadside assistance to hell. why aren't hotdog ads allowed in nascar? So, to feed their interest and mold them into the perfect NASCAR racer, speed through these jokes. When you get hit by a guitar truck, is it a fender-bender? What does the GT stand for on a Ford?Glued together. 23. I think its important to keep the races separate. Theres no doubting that terrific dad jokes about cars have a lot of force. Theyre gut-wrenching and utterly cheesy, but car dad jokes have a certain allure that cant be ignored. Here are some of my favorite car dad jokes to make your day a little brighter. Son: Hey Dad, whats an alcoholic? Dad: Well son, do you see those 4 cars? Tony takes off his T-shirt and shorts. Absolutely, just flush a bag of M&M's down the toilet. He drove a Honda, but he didn't say much about it. Renato. 85-2987. They already have the drivers. NASCAR isnt always just about the race. Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who Would be saved? Who is there? Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. A: For identification. I'm not a fan of NASCAR My girlfriend told me my love making reminds her of Earnhardt Jr. Because everytime I do good I find away to wreck it before I finish! Must Read: Carl Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. Why do rednecks like to do it doggie style? 4. The Mechanic waves and says, "Welcome back, Roger, Nice dogs, sir." By doing so it creates people with an unfair advantage when it comes to competition. VIDEO: Annoyed rugby player deals with troublesome drunkard in morning traffic, Victor Osimhen: Nigerian striker nominated for Serie A Player of the Month award, Chelsea defender gives gives interesting reason Potter is a great manager, Video: How Al Batin defender's spectacular goal line clearance denied Ronaldo sublime solo goal, Glazer cloud hangs over improving Man Utd, Which is the richest football club in the world in 2023? He sits down and asks how Dale Earnhardt Jr is doing. The bartender says "Earnhardts is in 25th". How many NASCAR fans does it take to change a tire? Get spokes people to talk about the sport instead of real drivers of a stock car like the days of Richard Petty. 42. What do you call a German electric car?A Voltswagen. How do you know a car is a good price?If it is a-Ford-able. Kyle Busch replied, "I told him I was driving around with Jeff Gordon and I'd just killed the old goat." There are two types of people in this world, those who drive and those who exploit those What goes around comes around. Why is NASCAR a white dominated sport? WebNASCAR Jokes Jeff Foxworthy 519K views 8 years ago Blue Collar Comedy Tour: The Guys' Favorite Jokes Pablo Hermes 8.8M views 14 years ago Larry The Cable GuyPart 2 Whats the difference between a Ferrari and six trash bags full of recyclable cans?I dont have a Ferrari in my garage. Yeah. This time, he comes back pretty messed up - he's got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious. Les Listes is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites. The race at Kentucky was was more exciting than any soccer match ever played. A couple of laps later, the bartender says "Earnhardt Jr is up to 10th". 2.Girls leaving club. What has an IQ of 100 and a full set of teeth? Mark Martin, Rusty Wallace and Dale Earnhardt found themselves in hell. Ridin' the Kahne Train 11. What did the traffic light say to the car? What do you call a VW bus at the top of a hill? This Fathers Day, Busch Beer, as part of its sponsorship of Kevin Harvick and his No. Apparently he hasn't passed anything for almost 2 years! one advertises there sponspors and the other keeps it hidden. Remember that curb you hit when parking? But who needs car jokes when having a car that eats like a horse (yet has less than 200 horsepower) is a joke in itself? Ok": Employee Leaves Work During An Emergency Because Manager Wouldn't Approve His Overtime, Clueless Director Calls For A Meeting Over Mass Resignation After Company Cancels WFH, Employee Explains It In A Way He Would Understand, Storage Company Charges Client For Something That Never Existed, So She Pretends Like It Does And Now They Have To Find It, "False Frugalities": 45 Examples Of People Trying To Save But Actually Losing Money, Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" I guess that makes me racist. Who can drive all their customers away and still make money?Taxi drivers. A Sprint Cup race is on a TV. In nascar they wear their sponsors on their shirts. What do we want? "What?" A: A Good Start. Kids may not know how to drive, but that doesnt stop them from loving cars any less. In a tomato race, one tomato driver said to his competitor, ketch-up! but I hear it's popular in some circles. Web114 Funny Car Jokes To Accelerate Your Day. A: Their Last Big Hit Was As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myselfAh, this takes me back.. A: At Any NASCAR Event. How can you tell if a car is from Switzerland?It remains in neutral. The kid says, "I will be when my father, Jimmie Johnson, finds out who I saved from drowning." Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? Turns out he was just telling me he approved of my driving. Politicians should be required to dress like NASCAR drivers. Nascar. Knock, knock! because no-one else would be able to ketchup. 50. What do you need to be able to drive in the outback? Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. She took the carb-orator off my car! Drivers Lounge Illegal drag racing or street racing can become as dangerous or even more dangerous than a Nascar pileup. 4 car, is celebrating dad jokes like never before. 98% of all Jeeps ever made are still on the road today. Despite this, a thread by Dirt Track Digest shared some of the most hilarious dirt track racing tips to ease anxious fans, officials and drivers. 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Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. I'll have to find and take some notes on that article. Psst, also check out our list of the best car movies! Did you hear about the Yoga class for electric cars? 10k 173 comments u/Mattzlo Jun 11 2020 report A: So They Can Both Watch The Race Q: What Does Dale Earnhardt And Pink Floyd Have In Common? Toyota. Is it possible to watch NASCAR without a TV? Q: Why Do Rednecks Do It Doggy Style? Bad news: Your car is totaled.Good news: After the wreck, your Audi is finally an innie. What should you double check when buying an electric car?That your driving license is current. Why couldnt the frog find where he parked his car? Cassill Black 5. Superman thinks "GEEZ,what the hell has gotten into Kyle" but he gets back up on the stool and starts drinking again when all of a sudden WHACK!! 14. What did the little Nissan truck say to the big Nissan truck? After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the Child Welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to Danica Patrick, whom the boy firmly believes is not capable of beating anyone." Race cars! Q: Where Can You Find Thousands Of Redneck Jokes? Honda is the oldest car made in the world. The abundance of fresh air, sunshine and our beaches attract NASCAR fans When you cant find a parking spot, you turn down the volume to see better. 10. Jimmie is gone for about an hour when he returns. What professional sport would be more fun to watch if the athletes drank alcohol during? How do drivers eat healthily? Why does Matthew McConaughey only watch NASCAR in a mirror? What does NASCAR stand for? Fast food. What is Catwomans favourite racing game? What do you call fans who love Formula 1 and hate NASCAR? "My car broke down," says Special K, calmly. "Ever since my wife found them in my glove compartment." 40. The top gear UK segment on NASCAR is great and centers around countering those ideas. What is a lacrosse players favorite type of car?A dodge! If India ever hosted Nascar As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself My sweetheart is always taking health food crazes too far. 28. 33. READ ALSO: Finally! To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck?He wanted to bust a move. Q: What would Dale Earnhardt be doing if he was alive today? No matter how hard I try I still can't outrun a Nascar. You name it, and You Got It!" What should you do if a car is annoying you. The dog jumps up, and runs around the barstool 25 times. 9. Theyre both filled with white trash. 21. Then it clicked. Honda is the oldest car made in the world. "I don't know", says the man, "I've only had him for 2 years!" So the turns are all right all right all right. 7. 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